Donate In Memory of Andy Trahan

I want to personally invite you to join me in supporting ALK Positive through LUNGevity Foundation.

As I have shared through this blog, ALK is the gene responsible for Dan's cancer, and like all lung cancer research and medicine, is tremendously underfunded. ALK knows no limits and typically affects young people who are non-smokers or who have formerly quit. It is important to end the stigma that lung cancer is "just a smoker's disease." All lung cancer patients deserve life!

We have never met in person but Andy Trahan and his wife, Leslie, and their family have inspired me greatly since I found them online after Dan's diagnosis. 

Andy died June 19th, and I grieve with his family. I feel incapable of finding the right words to comfort them, so rather a donation feels right.

This is an excellent opportunity to raise much-needed funds for research and awareness for this important cause. Please join me by making a charitable donation. 

Thank you!

Young Cancer Family Starts Gift Business - We Need Your Help!

{Medical Update: Dan’s shoulder replacement surgery was successful! He is such a rock star; he was sent home the following morning. Like, 24 hours later–In a giant hospital t-shirt that said “get moving,” super tight scrub pants, and no shoes. Clearly, I was not prepared with an overnight bag. He started physical therapy after two weeks of resting and is driving, cooking, and managing his pain well. We are keeping a close watch on his edema for signs of infection but so far so good!}

I developed this little hobby of making gift boxes full of wonderful goodies. I pretended it was a real business and gave it a name, complete branding with developed collections, a web site, and social media accounts (because, you know, I have to go big). I tested the market and the response was actually great! In a few weeks, I have shipped six orders and hand delivered ten. Every week I have had a new client. Not bad for making it all up as I go along.

The inspiration for my hobby was a talented designer with a similar aesthetic doing gift boxes in Portland. I watched her on Instagram for FIVE years, awe-inspired (and jealous) as she took her project from working in her garage to a studio in the city. My innate inspiration is a devotion to giving to others. I actually made my first gift box when I was five –crafted from an old bank check box– and filled it with colorings, love notes, and wrapped it with tracing paper (probably covered in hearts). I made my best friend, Allyson, deliver it for me because I was too shy. It is a great joy for me to build beautiful designs today with the same creativity and affection as I did as a child!

HOW YOU CAN HELP

Because we have a peculiar situation with being a young family living with incurable cancer (yikes! ugh), there are benefits and challenges to starting a business.

The benefit (Yes! There actually is one!) is that Dan became eligible for disability income when he was diagnosed. He started to receive this income when we moved to Illinois and it enabled him to be a stay-at-home dad while receiving a modest income to provide for his family. Because he is a stay-at-home dad, I became a stay-at-home wife! I go to all of his doctor appointments and we hang out a lot. Because I will never look back and regret spending so much time with him. Right? You only live once. So then, the two of us can easily run our business from home, and renting and sharing a house with Grandpa Don (part of adjusting to our income) also gives us a huge garage for storage and equipment. And we get Grandpa Don, who crafts boxes for us and teaches me!!!

The challenge? To be honest, two years after his diagnosis, we filed bankruptcy. Without the excellent credit we previously had, we are unable to get a start-up loan. We have put what few pennies we could into developing our initial gift box designs and marketing them to get our initial clients. Now we are at an impasse. We need a significant sum to take us the next step forward–to making a profit that can be put back into the business so it can grow. As it grows, it will provide a steady income for our family. The current next step involves basic goals — being able to register as a business, purchase significant inventory, set-up e-commerce on our web site, improve our woodworking equipment, and print business cards.

Our goals can be reached because of Kickstarter. Please help our family on Kickstarter!

Kickstarter enables creative entrepeneurs to garner funding to establish their product or business from a community of small and large donors. It is an online service similar to GoFundMe, that allows users to contribute money. However, in this scenario, we are set up for a 30 day campaign and are only accepting pledges because your credit card is not charged unless we reach our goal – $15,000 – by our deadline – April 1st.

And we reward every level pledged! When we reach our goal, you will have helped AND you will get a reward from us! Pledges start at $5 and reach $300. Every pledge receives a gift. Please join the amazing backers we have so far!

Please help our family on Kickstarter!

Disneyland!

We did it! We went to Disneyland! Thank you to all of our amazing donors who helped make the trip possible! Thank you to Allyson Patterson, Aileen Fontana, Charlene Herzing, Doug Herzing, Patricia O’Brien, Javeed Shah, Frank Sierawski, Terrah Barkley, Bronwen Thiebes, Andrea Barry, Melissa Ritchie, April Catlett, Mark Nicklas, Linda Buchanan, Sarah Christensen, and the Lemont Township High School Class of 1995!

It was a quick trip–two travel days and two days in the parks–but the difference it made in our lives was incredible. I have told a few friends who have asked how it was, “I think it was so absolutely amazing because we went into it with very low expectations!” If you can believe it, Dan and I were slightly dreading it. We would never find ourselves interested in a place like Disneyland if we didn’t have a child, and the aspects of Disneyland that involve crowds, heat, lines, rides, and lots of expenses just overwhelmed us. As the trip neared and we started packing, I also found myself in withdrawal from two medications–suffering from headaches, jaw pain, teeth grinding, shaking, insomnia, dizziness and an upset stomach. The night before we left, I only got three hours of sleep, so I was not looking forward to travel and nervous about how I would do Disneyland with depression and anxiety / bipolar disorder.

I am thrilled to report that the first day of travel, Thursday, went fine and I got a good night’s rest in the hotel. Friday was our first day in the parks (Disneyland and Disney California Adventure) which seemed to momentarily cure me with the large amount of water I drank, hours of walking, a generous dose of sunshine, and time with Dan, Raine, and our friends. It also helped that my new medications were not giving me any new side effects! That alone was worth celebrating after the difficult last two months. Dan realized the crowds weren’t too bad, also kept hydrated with water, and fell in love with watching Raine experience everything. We timed the trip so that he would be traveling in between chemo treatments, and at the furthest outset from one. He not only did well, he was a rock star. We met our friends who came from Berkeley to join us–Dan’s best friend, Art, his wife Andra, and their kiddos Lucy and Wyatt. We discovered a decent pizza restaurant, established a relaxing routine of park and pool time, and found our groove. By the end of Friday night, as we all sat cuddled in the dark and watched the World of Color light/water show, I began to feel like I never wanted to leave.  Excited to discover we could all ride most rides and that Raine was up for anything, we spent Saturday doing as much as we could! We visited both parks again and while we didn’t see everything, we made it to some favorites like Splash Mountain, Cars Land, It’s A Small World, The Haunted Mansion, and Big Thunder Mountain Railroad. Raine got to pick out souvenirs, eat more than his fair share of sweets, and stay up late hitting the rides at A Bug’s Land in the dark with Lucy. A special treat was returning to our hotel Saturday night to hang out with Art and Dan’s other best friend, Jeff, who drove out from North Hollywood with his partner, Gwen, and a serving of one of Dan’s favorites–delicious polish sausage.

There are moments from this trip that I will cherish always… The pure joy Dan and I each felt watching Raine experience everything. The exhilaration of dropping and whirling on rides while holding Dan’s hand or hugging Raine. Laying on a towel at the pool, resting with my eyes closed while the sun warmed my skin, slowly evaporating the water all over me. Watching fireworks from our hotel parking lot the first night. Feeling a sense of pride that I could carry Raine, walk for hours, and sustain my energy while having Fibromyalgia. Also feeling gratitude as I watched Dan do the same, after all of the treatments and complications he has had since his diagnosis. We felt healthy, alive, and so very grateful.

Our last ride on the last night was Flik’s Flyers, a gentle whirling machine in A Bug’s Land. Raine rode in a life-size chinese food carton with giant leaves and twigs to create a balloon like flyer. Dan and I were alone in an animal cracker box. We sat across from each other, holding hands. As we swayed in the dark, I closed my eyes and gripped his fingers, enjoying the warm evening rushing over my shoulders and cheeks. I smiled and opened my eyes as Dan said “I love you.” And we kissed.

Help Us Get to Disneyland!

We have a FUNDMYTRAVEL account designated toward Raine’s FIRST trip to Disneyland and [hopefully!!!] our family trip ABROAD next Spring! BUT, we only have FORTY-EIGHT days left to fundraise for it. Donate $5 or more TODAY to help ease the financial burden of doing something so special and fun as a family! We want to enjoy our travels and not to worry about the stress of the cost. Our total at FUNDMYTRAVEL reads $490 but thanks to some snail mail donations, we have actually reached $900! We are HALFWAY there to our Disneyland goal. THANK YOU for helping and sharing!

Two Weeks in Photos 11/11-11/25

Look at these adorable nuggets! Raine had ten days with his cousins, Logan and Lexi, and major fun was had by all. They went to an indoor play center, played at our house, swam at their hotel, and played at the park. These photos were taken the afternoon that we got a package in the mail with handmade Ninja Turtle stocking caps by Pat LaPorte, the mother of one of Dan’s childhood friends, Ed Kulzer. Raine was beside himself with excitement at getting a package in the mail (will he ever understand that most families/kids don’t get so many packages!?) And so Logan and Lexi were SO excited for Raine; they were all wiggling and shouting as I opened the box. Of course, the hats were designed for Dan, Raine, and me, but instantly the kids picked their colors, wore them, and ran around like Ninja Turtle goofballs. If you are reading this, Pat, these special little hats went home with Raine’s cousins to Illinois. I love that they are all a part of their special little cousin Ninja Turtle club. (We kept the green one for Raine!)

I continue to believe that I live in the most perfect, beautiful place in the world for me and my family. This view is from Anne Amie Vineyards, in Carlton. Like Dan, my father loved the yellow leaves of the vineyards in autumn, so I was happy to take him and the rest of my family with Hattie to this one in our hometown with such a gorgeous view. It took me 9 years to find my genuine sense of home in Oregon, and that view of the mountain range beyond our town here in Yamhill county is it. It is a view that brings me a sense of belonging and peace in a way that I felt as a child looking out at the cornfields. We have a little sliver of that view of the Coast Range from our bedroom and living room windows. I cherish it.

My LuLaRoe Trunk Show + Fundraiser with Republic of Jam was followed by another fundraiser by the owners of Barrel 47, a lovely little gastropub here in Carlton. I designed the posters and most of the businesses in town had them in their doors and windows. The day before the event, Carlton Growler Boys / Carlton Corners reminded everyone about the fundraiser by putting a message on their marquee. Dan shyly asked me if there was going to be a time (sooner rather than later) when his face and name weren’t going to be plastered all over the place. I smiled and made no promises. Despite his reservation about being in the spotlight, we are so grateful for everything everyone here in our community is doing for us. To date, we have received donations from Barrel 47, Republic of Jam, Omero Cellars, Valley Emporium, Farmhouse Romance Boutique, Violet Rose, Ken Wright Cellars, and many, many kind citizens of Yamhill County.

By his third week post-chemotherapy treatment, instead of feeling normal again, Dan began to feel worse. He slept as much as he did the first few days after treatment but became increasingly slow in his movements and some of his cognitive processes. I kept excusing symptoms as part of fatigue, but by Wednesday the 19th, I was afraid that something else was going on. He had vomited for the first time, and then didn’t have an appetite all day so didn’t eat. That night, after I put Raine to bed, I talked to him about how he felt and checked his notes. He writes little descriptions in a small notepad every day to keep track of any changes in how he feels. I wasn’t concerned about what he wrote—I was concerned about how he wrote it. His handwriting was smaller than usual, the spacing was cramped, and full of errors and scratches. He told me it took him longer to write it than he expected, too. In light of a climbing temperature and these findings, I spoke with the on-call doctor and then took him to the ER in Newberg. He was admitted to St. Vincent’s in the middle of the night and stayed until Friday.

Thank you to Patrick, and everyone who continues to support us via social media and old fashioned phone calls and texts. Thank you also to Melissa for staying at our house with Raine Wednesday night. To Julie and Steve, who checked in on Rocco for us and did dishes. To Abbie and Bronwen for babysitting Raine. To Lorri and Carmen for letting me crash on your couch Thursday night and bringing us food. To Gayle who cleaned, picked up prescriptions, managed Raine, and cooked us dinner.

Did I mention that we feel extraordinarily blessed?

See, every kind thought you have for us matters. It is keeping us held together and taken care of by one another and our friends and family.

Support Us At Our LuLaRoe Fundraiser

Amy Mulder Photography

You are invited to our special event, Saturday, November 8, 2014 at Republic of Jam in Carlton, OR. 3:00-8:00 p.m. Stop by anytime and  say Hello! (I am also a hugger, so don’t be afraid if I hug you!) Guests will be able to shop LuLaRoe by Leah Ruth and Republic of Jam goodies* while enjoying music, appetizers, and drinks—and great company!

This will signal my return to work and I will be offering a special LuLaRoe by Leah Ruth Fall Trunk Show with a large selection of new clothing and exciting styles (like that super cute Amelia dress I am wearing in the photo above!) There will be a team of three lovely LuLa-Ladies joining me from Cannon Beach, OR and Tacoma, WA, bringing along more inventory! It is a very special, exciting event. Sizes available for girls are 2 – 8/10 for dresses and leggings and XXS-3XL for a variety of women’s styles –skirts, dresses, leggings, tops, and kimonos.

This is a great chance to stock up on fashionably comfortable pieces that flatter everyone. The dresses, skirts, tops, and kimonos are all made in the USA and at our event November 8th, LuLaRoe will match $1.00-3.00 for every item sold in donation to our family.  It has been a great joy for me to sell LuLaRoe this year and meet lovely and kind customers. Thank you to all of you who have written me emails and supported me through the last month! I am honored that my business venture will now be able to provide a way to support my family and give back to us in this time of transition and hardship.

Dan and I are also SO honored that our great little town is behind us and also providing support! There are numerous businesses supporting us and doing special donations and contributions Saturday the 8th, like profits of sales on wine bottles, yummy pizza, or gorgeous vintage inspired jewelry. It is all so fabulous and we love that this is a chance for us to get everyone we know together here in Carlton and show off everything we’ve got! Jam, macaroons, wine, microbrews, chocolate, ice cream, specialty gifts, etc.! We will have an updated list and descriptions shortly, so stay tuned!

*Speical thanks to ROJ who are also including web site sales for our friends and family afar!